Well, it took me nearly two years, but I've finally done it. I have now recorded commentaries for every episode of Firefly. I finish out this long, memorable journey, fittingly enough with the final episode, Objects In Space. In the show, River melts away and becomes the ship, a bounty hunter sneaks on board and wrestles with his own sanity while holding Simon at gunpoint and Jayne sleeps through it all.

Please join me for this one-man, pity party as I mourn the loss of such an amazing, innovative, funny slice of science fiction greatness in television. As is generally the case, please listen for my preemptive countdown before starting the episode on your DVD.

The Firefly commentaries have stopped here, for now. He understands. He does not comprehend.

My Firefly commentaries through the entire series are coming to an end with the thirteenth episode, Heart Of Gold. It seems a house of independent "companions" have got themselves into a world of trouble. One of the girls is pregnant by a powerful sociopath who will stop at nothing to claim his baby. Inara asks Malcolm and the crew of Serenity for help against this madman, and before you know it, it's The Jerry Springer Show with horses and lasers.

Please join me as I talk about the second season that never was, Shawna Trpcic's inspired costume designs and the search for Vera. As is per usual with these Firefly commentaries, please listen for my preemptive countdown before starting the show on your DVD.

....And oh yeah, Bwah!

Twelve episodes in, we come to one of my favorites from the Firefly series, The Message. The dead body of a fallen soldier is delivered to Mal and Zoe. For some reason, the police are in hot pursuit. An attempted autopsy brings about a rude awakening, and the body is very much alive. Turns out, he's transporting someone else's organs in order to make some quick cash for his family. Will he get home in time to deliver the goods, or will Mal and Zoe turn him in to the fuzz?

It's a harrowing tale, complete with a socially inept doctor, a naked soldier and something in a jar. As per usual with my Firefly commentaries, please wait for my preemptive countdown before starting the episode on your DVD.

It's the eleventh episode in the Firefly series, otherwise known as Trash. Don't worry, this is the good kind of Trash. It's the return of Saffron, now having added more men to her roster of husbands, and more names for herself (including Bridget and Yolanda). She once again crosses paths with Mal and the crew of Serenity.

This episode completes the caper portion of the series, along with The Train Job and Ariel. Let me know if I've missed any. In this adventure, Mal reluctantly teams up with his estranged wife in order to steal the first ever laser pistol prototype.

As always with these Firefly commentaries, be sure to listen for my preemptive countdown before starting the episode on your DVD.

Brandon Ortega joins me once again via speaker phone, as we take a look at Firefly's tenth episode, War Stories. Wash is jealous of the respect Zoe has for Mal, so he insists Mal take him on their latest adventure. A simple delivery operation becomes dangerous when Niska returns to kidnap Mal and Wash, holding them for ransom. Now, it's up to the remaining crew of Serenity to initiate a risky rescue mission.

Brandon and I discuss Book's past (or lack thereof), Jayne's eating habits and the cost of producing a weekly sci-fi series for network television. We also address what some of the cast members have been up to lately. Once again, be sure to listen for the preemptive countdown before engaging the hyper drive of your DVD.

Almost five months after recording our first joint commentary for Out of Gas we return to the series that started it all with Ariel, the only episode for which neither one of us have recorded a commentary.

Dear Diary. Today I took River to have a brain scan in a super-secure yet strangely dark Alliance hospital. The crew stole lots of shiny medicine and Jayne sold us out. It was the best day ever!

Notes:
Notes on currency in Firefly
Ariel Ambulance Rescue

My commentary for the episode, Safe is anything but. I bring up the topics of Buffy, The Village, Dogma and even my big, comfy couch. There's no telling what I may ramble on about. Please throw caution to the wind and join me in my delusion that I'm interesting. :) This was recorded on the 29th of March, in the year of our Joss, 2006.

The professionalism continues as I babble through the episode, Shindig. Darkman, Cowboy Bebop & Brisco County Jr. all get honorable mention. I marvel at the pretty sets and costumes, while praising the big, squishy brain with arms that is Jane Espenson.

Completing the first disc in the Firefly Box Set, I'm back with the episode, Bushwhacked. In this commentary, I make comparisons and references to Event Horizon, Hellraiser and South Park. Obscure pop culture, a shout out from my telephone and the occasional seconds of dead air prove that I know exactly what I'm doing. I'm like a trained ape, without the training.

The fun continues, as I record a commentary for The Train Job. This time around, I have notes and I've fixed my microphone. Actually, I fixed myself. In my previous commentary, I was too close to the equipment. I've since learned to restrain myself from making out with my mic.